Praise: I really liked how you wrote the entire book like it was something like a news article and you put yourself into the story, in a way. I really like how you did this because you made the fictional book seem like it was real because you wrote it like you were a “stalker” and writing about Max-Ernest and Cass’s adventures as an innocent bystander or someone like that. Another reason, well kind-of the same reason, I loved this book is because you would also “include” yourself in the story by “putting” yourself in the story which made the book seem like it was real instead of something that you made up. Another thing that I like from your book was that it had little foot-notes at the end of certain pages to keep the reader up to date with events in case they forgot. This helped me during the reading a lot because I would sometimes get lost and those note would help me remember.
Question: Something that I questioned was why you made the Midnight Sun, people study alchemy. I was puzzled by this because it sort-of toke away from the fact that the book could have been a true story because alchemy is sort of like REAL magic. Not the types that people do to earn your money on the side of the street; I mean legitimate magic like Harry Potter. I question this decision as I was reading the book and every time it started talking about alchemy it would lose the sense that the book was real and could actually happen.
Polish: The only things that I would change are the random moments of humour in a dramatic section of the book. Those random moments would ruin the suspense. So the only change would to be to save the humour for the sections that don’t have suspense or any other mood because it ruins the moment. Another reason why I would change that is because not only did it ruin the moment it also distracted me from what the main idea of the section was talking about.
